PCOS - check. Infertility - check. IVF - check. 43 years young - check. Sick of babydust - fricking double check. Join a Scottish infertile as she slowly swirls down the plughole. Now with added donor egg flava.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

I always wanted to run away to join the circus

Yeah, yeah, Amy! Stop nagging me!! I have been back for days, I know.

Man, the jetlag is kicking my butt! I have been back at work since Monday and I can hardly get my head off my desk.

It does not help that I am having extremely vivid dreams/nightmares every night that I am on a hospital ship and all that separates me from unspeakable things is the pull-round curtain. How would I know? I have never been on one. It is freaking me out. I do sleepwalk a lot, to the usual accompaniment of vivid dreams but thankfully I have been confined to bed only during these film noirs. I think it is definitely the jetlag.

Our trip was ace. It was just the antidote Mr P and I needed but the trouble is that as soon as I am back home, all the IVF crap comes flooding back with all the attendant bad feelings. I did not think about it at all whilst away. This was due to being too busy self-medicating (sucking down Tim Horton's iced cappuccinos at least twice a day, complete with doughnuts and dutchies). When I fall off the no sugar/no caffeine wagon, I really fall and hit hard!

The highlights of my trip were the cabin where we stayed for a week near Lake Huron, the fulfillment of my dream to finally see the Cirque de Soleil (on their last day in Toronto) and our final stay in Toronto in the utmost swankiness. The bed in the hotel room was so big that I almost broke my neck getting in and out of it. I felt like the princess and the pea.

After all the communing with nature and swimming and hiking, I was ready for some big city time. We shopped, ate, drank strawberry daiquiris and Heineken, shopped some more. The Film Festival was on and I star spotted Charlize Theron and Jake Gyllenhaal ouside the Intercontinental on Bloor West. And the weather!!! It was fantastic, especially the second week where the temp stayed around 30c. Needless to say, I was thrilled to be told by the pilot coming home that the temp at Glasgow Airport was only 10c. My heart (and toes) shrivelled at the thought.

The house was cold when we got home too. It certainly looks like summer is gone here. My Japanese maple is turning already. I was glad that I managed to have a final summer fling in Canada.


At 4:14 AM, Anonymous amanda said...

I'm glad you had a good time. Cirque de Soleil rocks. I'm glad you were able to go.

At 4:43 AM, Anonymous mm said...

Welcome back!! Jake G.?! Swooon!

At 8:48 AM, Blogger Ova Girl said...

Welcome back. I'm also a Soleil fan, have seen two of their shows here in Sydney.

At 1:32 PM, Anonymous thalia said...

Welcome back. Am v envious of the caffeine and sugar, it sounds like just what I need. And I looove those big hotel beds!

Sorry there is so much crap awaiting you on your return.

At 6:25 PM, Blogger amyesq said...

It's about time... heheh kidding. What I mean is welcome back! Glad your tirp was good, I was so hoping for some nice relaxation time for you. Dang, that hotel looks very lush.

At 4:43 AM, Blogger ninaB said...

I'm so happy you had a good time in 'my town'! I don't actually live in Toronto now, but grew up nearby. I imagine that's where we'll end up eventually. My sister and I went to one of the very first Soliel shows they ever did..back in 1987. My god that was a long time ago.
Sorry you experienced such a crappy IVF cycle and outcome. You deserved the holiday.

At 7:19 AM, Blogger MC said...

Welcome back. I've been off the no caffine and sugar wagon this holiday as well.

At 9:23 PM, Blogger Donna said...

Isn't Cirque the best? We got hooked about ten years ago and are lucky enough to live near a city the touring company visits every year. Sounds like a wonderful holiday.

At 12:01 AM, Blogger zhl said...

Welcome back. Sounds like a wonderful break. Hope your return is gentle and too great a shock.

At 5:07 PM, Blogger Mellie said...

Welcome home! We all really should take vacations more often. Sorry the IVF stuff came crashing back to you, though. Maybe the memories of the holiday will help stave off the if anxiety a little longer?


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