Pamplemousse

PCOS - check. Infertility - check. IVF - check. 43 years young - check. Sick of babydust - fricking double check. Join a Scottish infertile as she slowly swirls down the plughole. Now with added donor egg flava.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Notes From The Bunker

I have a pain in my chest from the anxiety.

I spent an hour on the phone to my donor this morning, talking her through what tomorrow will bring, the anasthesia, the nerves, the wobbliness after the procedure, the arrangements for the picking up and dropping off that we will do as she cannot drive afterwards. Talking about how she feels and how the trigger shot went last night.

Have I told you that she is pathologically afraid of needles? She gave herself the trigger without the benefit of an injection pen. I offered to go round and give her the shot but she said no need. She has come a long way since the first visit to the clinic where she had to lie down to have blood taken as she was so green!

I finally had my last sniff of that damned Synarel last night. My nose lining is very grateful. It will be nice to blow my nose without blood streaks on the hankie.

I assumed the position for the first progesterone suppository this morning and I remembered to stock up on panty liners. I am bloated to hell. I just put my shorts on in preparation for going out to the garden and they are too snug, even with an elasticated waist.

I am having flashbacks to the previous IVFs where we had nil fertilisation. I told T this morning in an e-mail that if I could pray, I would do it now.

Who will talk me through this?

23 Comments:

At 2:12 PM, Blogger N said...

I too, would pray for you now, if I could pray. BUT I will keep every goddamn finger crossed that I have and you can't imagine how hard it is to type with crossed fingers.

But seriously now: You are doing such a great job supporting your donor like this. You are doing great and you will have T: to hold you hand and talk you through all of this, haven't you? If not, I can do it....

Hugs!

 
At 3:07 PM, Anonymous amanda said...

We will, of course. You will totally get through this. I know the anxiety sucks, though. I'm right there for my own cycle right now.

Hang in there. We're all here for you.

 
At 3:29 PM, Anonymous Lynnette said...

I'm here, too! Good luck!

 
At 4:01 PM, Blogger DD said...

Praying hasn't apparently helped me much, either, but I do...just in case. I'll do a little for you as well.

I wonder if my phone service would consider calls to the UK roaming. They probably do so I'll have to talk you through it via comments and email. You know where to find me.

 
At 4:23 PM, Anonymous mm said...

Ooh, oooh... we will!! Pick us! I will definitely be thinking of you over the next few days. Good luck, good luck.

 
At 4:57 PM, Blogger Chee Chee said...

We are all here for you. Hoping for the best and praying when (and if) you can't.

 
At 5:44 PM, Blogger Katie (WannaBeMom) said...

I can pray, and do, and will. Often. For you and me, pet.

If I could talk you through this anymore, I would. I'm almost holding my breath--

Love-love-love and luck-luck-luck.

 
At 6:08 PM, Blogger Millie said...

Oh, honey, if I were a prayer I'd be saying lot of them for you. Instead I'm thinking nothing but good thoughts and sending you lots of love and energy.

We're all here for you to talk you through whatever.

Lots of love, good wishes and luck coming your way.

 
At 7:06 PM, Blogger Beagle said...

Ditto on the "we will!"

Look you have a whole team of talk you through it'ers!

You can do this. Damn the elastic pants anyway, maybe now is the time for naked co-ed gardening? Just a thought.

 
At 7:17 PM, Blogger fisher queen said...

Good luck, good luck!!!!

 
At 7:19 PM, Anonymous Kath said...

Dear Pamplemousse, I'm mentally talking you through every step. Not so much on the details -- which you know much better than I do -- but on the reassurance and comfort side of thing. I'm thinking of you and wishing you no end of success.

Naked co-ed gardening -- waaahhaaaaa what an image!!

 
At 7:38 PM, Blogger Mellie said...

You're doing great my friend. Wishing for the very best for you and your donor.

 
At 8:03 PM, Blogger Lisa said...

Put on whatever fits, even if it's your pyjamas and go out into the garden - it always helps me when I'm feeling anxious.

I'm there with you in spirit and I'm sending all the good vibes I can muster your way. I'm wishing nothing but good things for you.

 
At 8:30 PM, Blogger linda said...

Good luck tomorrow!!!

 
At 2:06 AM, Anonymous Ann Marie said...

Good luck! By the way, I think it's awesome that you are able to speak to your donor. I think it's exclusively an anonymous thing at my clinic....I just think it's great.

 
At 5:39 AM, Blogger sube said...

Wishing you and your donor tons of luck over the next few days. You have so many people pulling for you.

 
At 6:53 AM, Blogger Sparkle said...

Very excited for you, can't wait to hear how everything goes.

Synarel sucks, happy that you no longer have to snort.

Fingers crossed.

 
At 12:42 PM, Anonymous T said...

And what did I tell you darling dear who hasn't blogged about Billy yet? The internets would pray for you! And here they are.

Thinking about and hoping for you all today!

 
At 1:19 PM, Blogger Thalia said...

Not the praying type, here, but I am thinking and hoping and wishing and holding you and your donor close to my heart. I see no reason why the next few days won't go well.

Thinking of you constantly.

 
At 2:06 PM, Blogger Nico said...

I second, third, fourth everyone else! Thinking tons of good thoughts for you. I hope that the retrival tomorrow goes swimmingly, and that you end up with lots of nice embryos to choose from in a few days!

 
At 4:20 PM, Blogger amyesq said...

I can pray. And so I will.

 
At 4:21 PM, Blogger Kris said...

Ditto, Ditto, Ditto! I so hope everything goes well for you and your donor the next few days. I'll be praying, wishing and hoping for you.

 
At 4:50 PM, Anonymous Marne said...

Okay sister - it is almost 12 PM in the states (East Coast that is) and we are very anxious for your news. I hope beyond hope beyond hope...

 

Post a Comment

<< Home