Pamplemousse

PCOS - check. Infertility - check. IVF - check. 43 years young - check. Sick of babydust - fricking double check. Join a Scottish infertile as she slowly swirls down the plughole. Now with added donor egg flava.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Chicken Licken Is Back In The Henhouse

Before you even think it, no I have not peed on anything.

It is 10dp3dt and I am terrified of seeing the negative that I know is awaiting me. In my own twisted mind, if I don't test, then it is not happening.

In fact, I reckon that if I wait a few months, the answer will be apparent. Aaah, denial is a wonderful place to live.

The journey home was its usual 9 circles of hell. No, hell is the other travellers who dare to annoy me. You know who I mean.

The people who instantly recline their seats as soon as they sit in their seats and mean that I end up with 10cms of space.

The parents who think an international flight of 400-odd people means their toddlers have an endless pool of babysitters to choose from and can wander at will amongst the aisles.

The people who leave their light on in the space above them all night, regardless of the fact that they have fallen asleep instantly in their reclined seat (bastards).

The people who leave the airplane bathroom in the foulest condition for me, after I have stood and waited 20 mins for the use of said bathroom.

I could go on as I am a very grouchy traveller. No amount of Rescue Remedy or deep breathing can alleviate it.

My top tip, as a woman, is never to set off the alarm going through boarding security at Schiphol airport in Amsterdam. If you do, you will be frisked in places that only your partner has ever been and even then, only after at least a botttle of decent wine and dinner.

Some of my very closest real-life and blog friends are lesbians and a more charming, polite lot you could ever meet/email but I am sure they employ the most sex-starved, single lesbians in the Netherlands just for female body searches at security.

I was blushing. And believe me, it takes a LOT to make me blush after 7 years of infertility treatments where nothing is sacred in the stirrups.

The worst thing??? It happened on both transits through Amsterdam. And all I was wearing both times was my standard travelling outfit of only wedding ring, watch, birkenstocks, underwear, cropped trousers and a sweatshirt. What the fuck was setting off the alarm both times?? I think they just wanted to cop a feel.

13 Comments:

At 4:33 PM, Blogger DD said...

Curses! You haven't peed on anything? Well, anything that you can share with us?

Fark!

The screener probably slapped some metallic tape to your back in the bustling. Just know that you are now some lonely lady's fantasy...besides my own.

BTW: so will you test or wait it out four more months?

 
At 7:02 PM, Blogger Thalia said...

Oh I so know what you mean about schipohl - rotterdam is bad too. Did she grope your boobs? That's what they used to do to me. And..well we won't go there. Sorry you had such a grouchy trip back.

Exactly how long are you going to wait?

 
At 8:52 PM, Blogger Becks said...

I've been following your story and this girl south of the border just wants to wish you loads of luck for your results. Oh, I've been felt up in Amsterdam too...and it was in the airport!!

 
At 10:11 PM, Blogger Amyesq said...

Mmmm, sounds like you are the hottest thing going in Amsterdam right now. More fantasy fodder for Mr. P!!

EVERYTHING crossed for you right now!

 
At 10:54 PM, Blogger Beagle said...

That airport experience sounds horrid!

I am keeping the hope alive for you . . . fingers crossed here.

xoxo
B

 
At 10:55 PM, Blogger MsPrufrock said...

I was felt up in an airport once thanks to my underwire bra - you know, that confounded new invention that the security people were just getting wind of. They even seemed confused when I told them that I was wearing an underwire bra. They checked to make sure I had nothing stashed under the boobage with the underwire.

I'm impressed no stick-peeing has occurred. I trust you will keep us reliably informed dear. Good luck, whenever the stick-peeing happens.

 
At 1:21 AM, Anonymous T said...

You are HOT STUFF! No O then? heh, heh.

Ok, no pee. I can understand that and will lay off - unless I get loaded - then all bets are off!

Sorry about the crappy travels - I hate traveling. G's parents just offered us another set of tickets for december - OUCH!

 
At 2:36 AM, Blogger Jess said...

Oooh, frisked in an airport. Fun. :p

But, here's what I'm going to need you to do....

PEE on a STICK. And not one from a tree, either. Unless you have an HPT-growing tree in your backyard.

When is the beta? You can't mean to go in blind, can you?

 
At 2:44 AM, Anonymous Janie said...

Glad you are home safe and sound and survived being felt up at the airport. (hug)

But what I really want to say is:

Sweey Jay-sus woman, POAS already!!!

I am doubling up my P$PT thoughts and keeping it all crossed for wonderful news soon.
Muah!
J.

 
At 5:48 AM, Blogger tonya said...

Eeeww, creepy security types copping feels. {shudder}

I promise not to ask you to POAS again if you share when your beta scheduled for? I mean, not to be too pushy or nosy. Just still rooting for you!

 
At 9:33 AM, Blogger M said...

yay for no pee! pee sticks are evil, let hope live and in a few months or so you'll have a fair indication of the result (which i hope is good...)

x

 
At 3:14 PM, Blogger Solitaire said...

Hoping for good pee-sticking news soon! Good luck!

Your "grouchy traveller" comments made me laugh - I think we are twins in that respect! Sorry about the Schipol airport crazies, though. I got on the wrong side of them once when trying to surreptitiously sleep there overnight as a poor starving student. Never again!

 
At 3:46 PM, Anonymous orodemniades said...

If the detectors are set to highest sensitivity then the littlest thing such as perfume or underwire bras will set them off.

Sorry your journey back was shite!

 

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